Friday, June 29, 2012

Running for my life

I have taken up running.


This is not my first or last time I will have to re-train myself to run. I'm not a huge fan of running. I love the feeling after I've completed a run and I see my time and realize that I am getting better, despite the pain I feel.

I also love listening to my music, not having to think about anyone else for a half hour, and just being outside at dawn, before anyone else is awake, makes my day.

And that feeling you get, after running for a bit, when your body is adjusted to it all and you hardly notice you are running anymore...oh wait, that doesn't happen.

When I run, it's a very scary picture. People tend to move away when they see me coming. I was told before that I run "funny". Awesome confidence booster there. I also turn bright red and pant like I'm in the middle of birthing another child, when in fact, all I can seem to accomplish is 2 miles. Barely.

I don't know why I do this to myself.

Yes, yes I do.

Because I keep thinking that one day, I may accomplish a run that's more than 2 miles. That one day, I can keep these extra 20 lbs from spreading across my ass making it appear as if my thighs are full of cottage cheese. Then maybe I'll get that feeling of accomplishment from doing something that I trained so hard for and did something I've been scared of for so long.

When Jay and I took our trip up to Duluth for a weekend, we were there during Grandma's Marathon. HUGE run. Look it up if you don't know. Just because I'm nice.

We were driving at that point, taking different routes because the run was still going on when we were trying to drive in town. It was crazy! I cannot believe how many people did this run and it was not at all what I expected! Most looked like they trained for years. Some looked like they decided to get up today and just go for it. But no matter what they "looked" like, I was amazed by the actual attempt. We even saw a pregnant woman finish the run. Wow. I could barely get my ass out of bed during pregnancy, let alone complete a full out marathon.

It was inspiring watching these people finish a race they committed themselves to doing, for whatever reason. It was also inspiring to watch everyone encourage each other during and after the race.

To see someones face as they finished running 26 beautiful miles. I wanted that feeling. I also wanted a medal. And a t-shirt. Free stuff is awesome. (I know that it's not "free" but still...leave me alone.)

Part of me would love to be there at the end, cheering on those that finish. To photograph their faces and bottle up those emotions to keep with me forever.

The other part of me wants to be that person finishing a race. Doing something I never thought possible before.

Why can't it happen for me?

Not sure. Ok...that's untrue. It might be because I'm lazy. I have a hard enough time getting my own butt out of bed at 5:30 a.m. to run around my neighborhood for 2 miles, let alone train for a 26 mile race.

Plus, I heard something about losing toe nails...that's a little scary. I think my toe nails have a job to do down there, I think they should stay there. My feet are hideous enough without removing a nail that I can decorate and disguse the ugly.

I keep seeing all the people on my Facebook, in blogs and in books, completing HUGE races (including something called an Ultra-marathon? Holy crap...didn't even know that was an option.) and I really want to be one of those people.

Kind of.

So I decided to start small. This almost doesn't feel small enough, but I'm going for it. Why not? This Sunday, I will be running (with my husband and friend) in the Warrior Dash.

It's a simple 5K. With challenging obsticles. Look it up- And it's for a good cause.

I'm scared.

And excited because there's a medal AND a helmet at the end as a prize! Plus beer. If your into that sort of thing...which I will be.

I just keep thinking it will be like Basic Training obstacle course, without all the screaming about how much I suck at life. I hope. My husband might yell at me like that once he realizes how much I plan on slowing him down, but it's only to be expected.

Hopefully, I make it to the end, even if Jay has to strap me to his back or drag my heavy, filthy, mud covered, carcass across the finish line.

Because I really, really, really want that helmet. It even has horns...I'm going to wear it always.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

I'm becoming unhinged.

There has already been a meltdown today over a spoon.
Full out screaming fit, with tears, that included a time-out.
Over a spoon.
I could hardly pick him up and carry him to his bed, he was so fiesty.
Because of a spoon.
I have two color-changing spoons that came out of a cereal box.
I have 3 kids.
What do I do?
I throw the spoons in the trash.
Ruined my day, they did.
Since becoming a full-time Stay-at-home Mom, I have gone crazy.
I keep spacing out.
I haven't talked to a friend in weeks. WEEKS I said. That's too long.
I miss my friends.
I miss laughing.
I miss having conversations that aren't arguments about who hit who first.
I really need to get out more.
Vent over.
I forgot we had speech therapy today.
We walked to a garage sale, 2 houses down from us.
Ran into our therapy lady there and was like "hey, what are you doing here?"
She said, "looking for you guys because our appointment started 5 minutes ago."
 See above about "spacing out".
So the kids were not thrilled because they are used to playing outside at this time.
Dealing with cranky kids is awesome.
And I had Evan that kept asking me if it was ok for him to poop.
He doesn't ask or tell us at all, if it's just us here.
But when we have company, we get the full description, color, shape and size.
Thank you for that Evan.
Our Therapist didn't really need any more evidence that I was a crazy person, but I'm pretty sure CPS will be here any moment.

Our backyard is fully fenced, containment system.
There's one way in and one way out.
Unless the garage is open, apparently.
Scared myself today when I called everyone in for lunch.
I was waiting for them all to meet me at the fence, Morgan met me at the house door.
She could have easily walked to the street.
Big sigh of relief that I noticed right away.
But huge wave of Mommy guilt for what could have happened.
I hate Mommy guilt.
It's so heavy and will sit with me for days.

This face? Multiply this by 3 and that's my day. My head won't stop throbbing. It's all blurry because she was kicking me in my ovaries and it made me cry a little.

Ever have one of those days when you just want to put everyone to bed and hide in the bathroom with a book?

I'm past that.

And I found a spider in the laundry.

I'm so done for today.


Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Can I get any hotter?

The answer is no.

Today I purchased new shorts. I never wear shorts. I am not a fan of my legs and figure the less I expose to the world, the better. But it's hot outside today (for MN anyway). And I was going to be in my backyard so figured that I should just go for it. Plus, they looked comfortable, had an elastic wasteband and were a lightweight fabric that may come in handy for bedtime or running. (Or so I thought!)

These here are some multi-purpose shorts! Two pair for $6! It's a steal! (I wonder why they were so cheap?)

Guess where I bought them? From a classy clothing store?

Sure...if you consider Menards classy. I didn't even know Menards sold clothing. Until today.

Yes, I know the view is wrong, but you get the point. I bought a Large, because I have a flat, but wide butt and it takes up some space. And I figured I wanted them comfy and not all tight across my nether bits.

I was so excited! My husband would be so proud of me for shopping so cheaply! I found shorts for cheap that can be used for more than 1 purpose! Woo-hoo! I even did a happy, money-saving, dance.

Then I tried them on.


These are snug. I didn't know the Large would be so snug...

Then I started to walk.

Oops! I don't think they were supposed to ride up in there! Oofta. If you have seen pictures of a camel toe can imagine what I was experiencing here. I guess will NOT be running in these. That would be a picture and a running down the street, grabbing my crotch every second to yank these tiny shorts out of my girly bits. The elastic wasteband would be more comfortable if it were to stay in position and not try to help the shorts ride up. And they are very TIGHT around my thighs. Nice images I'm painting for you, huh?

These will not be a pair I will be wearing in public.

I can't get my lower half to stop eating them when I walk.

Oh pajamas for $6. Jay doesn't care what I look like. And they work fine if I plan on staying in the backyard, out of the public eye and sitting down the whole time. Paired with my Walmart shirt and dirty, unbrushed hair, I was ready for the "Sexiest Mom" Award for my block. I even have uneven tan lines and fuzzy leg hair! Beat that Real Housewives of whatever.

While I was at Menards I purchased a pool.

(I can hear my husband, typing on his cell phone as he reads this, "you bought a what? Do I have to take your debit card away?" I'm psychic. Trust me.)

I wish it was one that could fit more than my big toe, but those cost more than I have and unless I'm selling an egg (yes, I mean THOSE eggs) we will stick with the small pools.

It's cute. But tiny. It had to be. My car is tiny.

I have too many of those moments already, where I ask myself the important questions way too late.
Like, "was it a good idea to have kids?" as I'm pregnant with the twins.
I didn't want to be asking myself, "Will this pool fit in my car?" as I'm sweating the parking lot, staring at my vehicle with 3 kids and a large plastic disk, in a shopping cart, that I already paid for.

So we purchased the small pool for $6. I didn't want something I had to exert energy for by blowing up with my lungs. I want to be able to dump it and throw it in the garage (sorry Jay) and be able to pull it out again, without too much effort. I'm lazy.

And it's quick to fill, quick to empty and quick to clean when someone poops in it.
You can never be too prepared for what your kids will do.

After filling the pool he did this. I really wanted to turn it on..but I'm not like that. Ok. Whatever. I considered it but knew that the second I moved, he would too.

He splashed me as I splashed him and this is the picture as it happened. That water was COLD so you can see why his expression is "holy crap!"

What happens when you swim and try to go down the slide wet? Nothing good. Your thighs loudly squeak as you shuffle down awkwardly, leaving wet streaks in your wake, and everyone around knows that you are having a painful time getting down that slide. Then you cry when you reach the bottom after noticing how red and painful your thighs/butt are. He even gave himself a tiny thong from this, because his swimmers crawled right up there...I know how that feels buddy. Stupid $6 shorts...

My Mo Mo. Love that belly. That's her "ranch dressing" belly. She eats it by the fistful. What? So do I, so I see nothing wrong with it. Ranch goes with everything. Sorry...sidetracked. The water was freezing so she took it slow by dipping in one toe at a time.

It's not poop (yet) but sand. Declan decided to experiement with combining our sandbox and pool. It's like a beach in the backyard! He's a genius!

Anyway. I love summer sometimes. I love Autumn more. I'm trying to enjoy this before it gets cold and it will be harder to get everyone outside. But with all the wet clothes, sand everywhere and not being able to wear jeans all the time, I'm looking forward to some cooler temps.
There's a reason I like living in Minnesota.
 I like cold.
And I hate shorts.

Monday, June 25, 2012

My husband has me all figured out.

The mystery is gone from our marriage.
I'm no longer a puzzle to him, nothing is a secret any longer.

Jay understands who I am, encourages me to be someone I can only dream of, thinks I'm a good Mom and he loves me for being just me. In all my sloppy sweatpants, curly hair, non-showering glory. He knows where I like to eat, what I like to eat and we generally crave the same things at the same time. It's as if God created a best friend/husband just for me. I have never been so in-sync with someone before.

Jay has the ability to surprise me when he wants to, which tends to scare me a bit because he could get away with much more than I thought. I'm a little oblivious. He has the best surprises too because he knows what I love (usually books).

This may sound boring to you. Maybe you enjoy having some mystery in your life. I'm not that way. My husband is the person I want to tell everything to. I don't have to think twice about what I say to him. He knows that I need my "me" time when I get overwhelmed and I when I have "sensory overload" at times.

That's why I think he also plots against me...just a little bit. Just to keep things exciting.

He has the ability to know EXACTLY what buttons to push that can piss me off in seconds. My kids have the built in ability to do this, my husband has had to learn it the hard way. But he has it DOWN.

And he knows exactly what happens to me when I get mad.

I clean.


So I'm pretty sure if our house gets a little messy and I have been slacking, he'll come home, push a couple buttons and get me yelling. All he has do is say something like "You didn't get to the dishes today?" or "I don't have any clean socks". We will argue for 5 minutes and then I automatically start cleaning, mostly to give my hands something else to do so they don't try to hurt him.

But an hour after we argue, we both aren't mad anymore and the house is shiny and new again. I will even do things I won't normally clean a window or something.

Then he will say something that will melt my heart and I will have to write down so I never forget it.

Evan was playing doctor with Jay last night and I just had to keep this in writing.

Evan: "Daddy, where's your heart? I need to check it?"
Jay: "It's with your Mommy."


I know, so simple, so easy and a little on the sappy side for my blog post. Sorry about that. I'm having a hormonal girl moment and this is the kind of crap that happens. Deal with it. See, I go from sweet to sour in a matter of seconds. I'm like that Sour Patch Kids commercial, but opposite. I'm tricky.

This one is for you Jay. I adore you.

Ah...that face. I just love it. Even with all that creepy gleaming in his eyes.

If this is your first time reading my blog...I'm sorry. I'm not usually this weird. I hope.

Friday, June 22, 2012

It's Friday!

I hate Doctor appointments that involve my children.
Holy crap. Our appointments were scheduled at 2:20-3:00.
We didn't leave that facility until 4.
With 3 screaming, crying kids after receiving 25 shots.
We were in that office for 2 hours.
2 horrible, long, stressful, loud hours.
I don't blame doctors or anyone for this.
It's life...I get that.
It's just a really crappy part of life.
They run around in that tiny office for 2 hours, with a few kids books and a space poster on the wall.
That's it for entertainment. I don't bring crap, because my arms are full enough.
They shoot through the supplied entertainment in a matter of seconds.
The rest of the time is spent fighting over the step stool, climbing under the table and cracking their skulls repeatedly on the bottom or fighting with each other.
It may be easier to bring them all separately, but that seems like a lot of effort.
Just bust it out all at once and torture the doctor at the same time.
Plus, who doesn't love to watch their kids get LOTS of shots?!?!

My sink won't drain.
It's FULL of dirty, disgusting dishes floating in gross, smelly dish water.
I lit a candle, all should be fine in about...never.
I tried running the dishwasher, because I know nothing of plumbing, and watched as my sink filled up with MORE water. Oops.
I called Jalon. He's busy working. Feel bad interrupting.
Called my Dad.
He is not thrilled with me at this moment, but may come by to save the day.
I think it has something to do with my lack of knowledge on plumbing crap.
Apparently my sink needs a snack. Or a snake. Whatever.
My Dad just doesn't like me interrupting his morning coffee with my stupidity.
But honestly, he should be used to it by now.
And I'm trying to be helpful and all by getting my sink ready for it's procedure.
I had to go in there and pull all the dishes out of that water.
It smelled so bad, I could hardly keep my waffles down...bleh.
We have a garbage the basement, still in the box.
It's so pretty.
One day it may be useful too.
(hint hint...Jalon?)

It's a beautiful day today.
I even turned off the air conditioner so I could open the windows.
It's at that moment I noticed how CLOSE we are to the neighbors.
Apparently, I can't even fart in my own living room without them looking over here.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Little Miracles in my Garden

I'm not a great gardener. I enjoy it-when the weeding is done anyway. But I'm always amazed, year after year, when stuff actually grows!

It's has to be a miracle.

I plant the seeds, water carefully and *poof* they grow! I have a black thumb, so the fact that I touched these seeds and they grow, should be documented.

I started gardening because I read too much. Books about our food industry, GMO's...all the crap. If I can save us, just a little bit, then it's worth it. Right?

It's hard work. I have no idea what I am doing. I water, I weed and I watch. That's it. I also pluck and eat, when that's required. I run from bugs and spiders. Worms have the ability to make me race out of the garden, tripping over the fence, until they disappear from sight. But my garden has been getting bigger and bigger as years go on because I can't seem to stop myself and really want a TON of healthy food.

This year I doubled what I planted from last year and included more variety. Next year may be similar, as we are planning on expanding our garden again. It's addicting! You cannot believe how addicting (unless you have your own garden). It's hard to stop once you start.

I decided to make pictures for you all to see, whether you care to see them or not =).

I have plans for all this "bounty". None will be canned, because I don't like the idea of all the work involved and the bacteria that can sneak in and ruin food so quickly. But I will use it, share it and eat it all. If, for some odd reason, we can't consume it all, we are going to freeze it in batches. Which works best for me, since I have 4 freezer options in my house.

Here are some pictures:
My tiny garden at the top. I have (from left to right) green onions, basil, cilantro, rosemary, oregano, green peppers are at the top and jalapeno at the bottom.

Baby Bell darn cute. Can't wait to chomp on them!

My overgrown cilantro. So pretty.

Random blue flower trying to sneak into the garden.

 There are a ton of them, but they are too pretty to destroy.

My pumpkin. This is taking over my second garden. Good thing I didn't plant too much in here. My second garden has the pumpkin, blueberry bush, raspberry bush, carrots, more bell peppers, watermelon and flowers along the edge. maybe that is a lot...

Pumpkin is trying to find somewhere else to go.

Tiny, baby blueberries! When am I supposed to pluck these? Time for some Google...

 The flowers along the edge are growing like CRAZY but they won't bloom! Darn it.

 Our flowering, purple vine plant. Very pretty.

My strawberries. Took me over a half hour to de-weed these.

And there are green beans growing! We even snacked on some today, just because we can.

Squash is getting started. I love zucchini! And I have probably 14 plants...oops.

My Roma tomatoes. I see lots of sauce in my future...or salsa...yummmm.

No idea. But it's beautiful and so colorful!

I just love the colors that are splashed around our backyard!

This is by the door. I planted a few but something was eating them. My Mother-in-law planted those pretty orange ones and put the sign in. The colors remind me of autumn. It's so pretty there.

Well, that's it. It's so fun to see kids eat everything out of a garden just because they helped grow it and helped pick it. Evan loves it when I pluck a green bean or a strawberry for him.

It is well worth all the effort. I can't wait to see some pumpkins and watermelons grow!

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

BBQ Bacon Cheesy Chicken recipe

I don't share recipes very often. What will I make to surprise you when you come over for dinner?

But, I'm in love with the idea of duplicating recipes from restaurants that I LOVE and they don't make anymore.

Today is a recipe that I created based on a chicken dish from Ruby Tuesdays. It was soooo good, until they removed it from their menu. Bastards.

I have tried this several different ways and will continue to make it several different ways, depending on what I have on hand.

The first step is to get onions. If you don't like the real ones, try Frenches fried onions. They work great. If you don't like those, I think a green onion or a chive would work as well. If you don't like those...then I really don't know what to tell you. I think onions add flavor to a dish, so I can't guarantee it will taste like it should without them.

I decided to use a Vidalia onion and I used Pioneer Woman's recipe- from her older cookbook- for Onion Strings. SO PERFECT...and really good dipped in ranch when you need a snack during the cooking process.

The recipe tells you to soak the chopped onion in buttermilk for a few hours. After this your fridge will smell terrible. Evan walked around the kitchen during my chopping process and complained that I was "boiling" his eyes.

Buy the book or see if she has it on her blog. It's the best thing ever!

Season your chicken using anything you like. I picked the BBQ 3000 because it's my favorite. Season heavily, unless your a big wimp, then do what works. Then find someone else to cook your chicken, because you will be busy. Unless you pop it in the oven. Feel free to cook it anyway you like. But because it's summer in Minnesota, I'm using my grill for EVERYTHING.

At some point you will also need to chop tomatoes and fry some bacon. I did this all ahead of time and didn't take any photos. Sorry. =)

Set up a frying station for your onion strings-unless you chose another route. I've also coated my chicken in Frenches Fried Onions and baked them in the oven. Turns out wonderful! But sometimes you have to go all out for a dinner- so a frying I shall go.

At Ruby Tuesdays, they served the chicken with their mashed potatoes and steamed broccoli. Best combination ever- so why mess with what works? But my mashed potatoes are awesome and very fattening. Enjoy.

I just used Russet potatoes, peeled and chopped. Boil until soft. Drain and put back on the burner to dry out a bit. Then, I dumped in a bit of milk, sour cream, cream cheese, butter, seasoned salt, pepper, minced garlic, cheddar cheese and green onions.

Mash until creamy. Then lick the masher will be too hard to resist.

Soooo creamy. Yum.

Once the chicken is cooked, you can build an assembly line and whip through this process quickly.

1. Start with BBQ sauce. I mixed together two of my favorite brands together. Dump on quite a bit.
Pretty....I can't get my stomach to stop growling at me.

2. Dump on your cheese. I used Cheddar because that's what I had and what I like with this dish.

3. Then sprinkle on some chopped tomato, crumbled bacon and those onion strings. After you chicken is done, add your steamed broccoli (just fresh chopped broccoli thrown in the microwave with salt) and your mashed potatoes.

ooooohhh...yum. The one on the left is Morgans plate. She ate the bacon and tomatoes. The one on the right is mine. I ate it all....seriously...every single bite.

Can you blame me? It was delicious!

I don't often post recipes because I don't often "create" them on my own. I find a few pieces here and there and combine them all for one dish. It works here, but other times, it's a hot mess.

The kids whined, threw fits and Declan ate only the broccoli, then left the table in tears.

But Jalon and I licked our plates clean.

And then I woke up at 5:30 a.m. to run that dinner off.


Tuesday, June 19, 2012

For those of you that live under a rock...

If you do not know me or maybe haven't been my friend very long, maybe you don't know that I am a PASSIONATE reader. Or as my husband will say-Obsessive, fanatical, infatuated, extreme, and zealous reader. I buy books before clothing (which is why What Not to Wear would never take me on).

Also, this is the reason I chose to become an author myself. Because I have too many damn ideas and I love to get lost in a story, so why not create my own?

But being a writer is a TOUGH job! I know this from selling books in a bookstore. It's a seriously competitive world and even a small suggestion from a bookseller is enough to get someone to buy a book.

AND on that note:

I have a suggestion. I have read ALL her books. Every single one and even read her blog like an obsessive stalker...she is wonderful. She's amazing. So very funny and well written. She describes things in such through detail, you can't help but feel the embarrassment that she is describing.

Who is she?

Her name is Jen Lancaster. Here's her blog:

And her Facebook page:!/AuthorJenLancaster

I have a feeling that you will be stalking her like I do. I tried putting her books in here, but because I'm new and clueless with technology, I can't figure out how to link them so the pictures show. Yeah. I'm awesome. But you can find them all on or in their store. Also, they are available in e-book format.

Trust me on this. Skip over that bull crap called 50 Shades of poop or whatever and try something hilarious-something worth picking up this summer! It's a perfect beach read that you won't be embarrassed to read in public!

Photographic Evidence

My family is out to get me. They have formed a shaky union that has a sole purpose to make me have a full-out breakdown. And almost 24 hours...they almost succeeded. EXCEPT- because of my constant surveillance, I have successfully identified every attempt therefore making me smarter and stronger alone, than they are together.

I had a quick conversation with Evan yesterday which led me to believe something was coming:
Me: "I'm feeling really happy today Evan."
Evan: "That's good, Mommy."
Me: "Don't you feel happy?"
Evan: "We will be happy when you are all done being happy, Mommy." -insert evil laugh-

Here is some photographic evidence for you:

This first picture is Declan "hanging" around. He falls through on purpose and just hangs there. For a longer time than my arms would allow. Then he falls to the ground, slams his head, gets up and does it all again. Over and over again...until my head hurts just from watching him.

I call the next series of photos "CAR TROUBLE". You can see why.

He tipped the car to dump her out faster. 

She was not thrilled. They did this repeatedly yesterday. I have two cars for this exact reason...but they always want the same one at the exact same time. Of course. I've given up. I have tried helping. Now I just take pictures and giggle as it happens. Much more enjoyable that way. And it shows them that they will NOT win!

This next photo is Evan. He decided to wear his underwear as swim trunks and he happens to be digging in his nose with his tongue at the same time. I kept asking if he knew he was wearing undies and he told me "I just don't care, Mommy." I guess it's a good thing we're in the backyard.

Jalon is also throwing in his own attempt to make me crazy. See that Pepsi? Guess what happens when you leave it in the freezer overnight? I'm pretty sure that if you drink pop, you have also figured this out. A beautiful mess. I have my work cut out for me today.

Look, it even created Stalactites. I looked it up.

-Insert my own evil laugh here- They will not win against this girl! I'm one step ahead of them...or one step behind, picking up the mess they all leave.

Maybe they did win after all?

I know this post doesn't make a lot of sense. But work with me here. I'm coming off a wonderful vacation and haven't even finished my Cinnamon Roll Coffee yet.

And I'm a little cranky because of the mess that's waiting for me in the freezer.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Is it Monday already?

It's 1:20 p.m. and already my day has been full of "interesting". Well, at least for me.

Tried changing Declans diaper this morning.
Took it off and then ran around the house looking for a fresh replacement.
Turns out, we didn't have any.
He was just chilling on the floor while I ran around like a crazy person trying to find something before he got up and "sprinkled" my house with pee.
I was even considering creating a diaper with towels and duct tape.
Fortunately, I located an old diaper bag and there was one left in there.
Then we ran to Target and picked up 2 of the biggest boxes I could find.

While at Target we found a snake.
Not a real one, but a sprinkler one.
Directions say to "inflate with water then attach hose".
Then tell me why the snake never filled but stayed flat while water ran out the holes.

That's when I remembered a delightful post from Pinterest.
Gosh darn you Pinterest.
I went to Menards (similar to Home Depot for you folks not from around here) and purchased $8 worth of plastic sheeting that was HUGE.
Then I used more duct tape than the Red Green Show.
(If you don't get that reference, you are seriously missing out! And Jalon-no snide comments.)
(Jay thinks I'm crazy for liking that show and the Mr. Bean show.)
(But I like shows that make me laugh and that always does the trick. I'm easy that way I guess.)
So basically, you tape up the edges and fill with water and it's essentially a water bed for outside use.
Then you watch it leak slowly when you lay on it.
I did use the entire roll of duct tape.
However, it does feel amazing! Nice and cool without getting wet.
Except Evan has been laying on it and keeps asking "What is it supposed to do?"
"This is boring Mommy..."
"Yes, yes it is. Count the leaks that it springs. That should keep you busy for awhile."

Yes, this is big. I know. So are the leaks.

Content little boy. For 2 minutes until he started getting bored anyway.

Wondering why his hands don't get wet. Took longer to figure out than I thought it would.

Turns out the snake does work.
Once you fix the problem with the water pressure coming out of the hose.
Cool beans.
Just 3 hours of effort for nothing.
Love it.
Isn't he an adorable waste of water? Fun stuff.

We purchased a new baby gate to prevent my "climber" from getting in the kitchen to cause chaos.
It is taller and has a door inside the gate that latches so we don't have to climb over anymore.
The door is difficult to use for even the most advanced adults.
My 5 year old keeps getting trapped and screaming and crying his head off while the babies nap and I fill assorted water toys outside.
I even put a jacket on the latch hoping it wouldn't close all the way but even that doesn't work against his special abilities and the doors knack for securing tightly no matter what stands in its way.

It's 2 p.m. Can it get anymore exciting?
If it does, I may need some Prozac to calm me down.