Tuesday, April 23, 2013


No, I'm not talking about time-travel or time lords...even though that would probably be a much better post.

Today is about traveling.

My husband and I took a trip a few weekends ago for our anniversary to the "big city" (Minneapolis).

It started out fine. Then, it just got plain weird and not so much fun.

We had a beautiful room:

A beautiful room that charged you for everything.
There was a seal on the fridge.
If it was broken, we paid $150.
We left that crap alone.
The closet was full of sealed robes and fuzzy socks.
If opened, we were charged $80 for each.
The pillows on the bed were for sale as well.
It was like sleeping in a store.

Lots of pretty windows to let in the light.

Our giant bathroom.
There was a TV in the bathtub area.
If you sat on the toilet, you could watch TV.
Which I did.
This here, this is luxury.

Froggie is all moved in.
He made himself at home quickly.
My husband was pissed when he saw him.
He's not a fan of Froggie.
Froggie has a tendency to sneak over and startle my husband in the middle of the night.
Which is why I keep him.

The bathroom after I moved in.
I have a lot of stuff...

Remember all the windows?
Not a great view during the day.
And at night, the view was interesting.
If you're a stalker.
I can see you!
Working late?
Sounds terrible.
Now do something entertaining while I have the camera out.
Friday/Friday night went perfectly.
We had an ok (super expensive) dinner and slept nicely.
Then we started off Saturday with the hunt for caffeine.
Except, nothing was open.
500 miles of Skyway in Minneapolis, all closed on the weekend.
(That may be slightly dramatic, but we're talking about caffeine).
After hunting for an hour, we stumbled across a Starbucks.
I had purchased a cinnamon roll, but was making a huge mess in public trying to eat it, so I decided to wait until we were back in our room to chow down.
But I forgot to eat it.
By the time we got back it was time for our appointment at the Spa in the hotel.
I'm not a massage person.
Never had one, never wanted one.
But I decided to give it a try.
Never again.

My skin hates me.
I was rubbed raw on my neck and it hurt like a sunburn.
No more massages please.
But I did get my feet and nails done.
They are ready for spring.
After our 5 hour spa day, I was so hungry, I was sick.
I forgot breakfast, we didn't get lunch and it was too early for dinner.
I felt like crap that whole night.
It was horrible to feel that way when you just want to enjoy the trip.
We both felt run down and so tired.
We decided it would be best to get to bed early.
Unfortunately, the city doesn't sleep.
It started with a phone call to our room, at 11:50 p.m.
We didn't make it in time to see who it was.
Jalon, freaked out, half asleep saying, "Who's that? What's that noise?"
I was like, "The phone. It's on your side. And you're 5 minutes too late dude."
Maybe 5 minutes after the phone call, Jalon's already asleep, and I hear a knock at our door.
Thinking some drastic emergency has occurred, I run to the door to answer it.
There's a random dude just standing there looking at me.
We had a 3 minute staring contest until I asked, "Can I help you?"
He said, "Um...I think I have the wrong room?"
Gee...what gave you that idea?
I shut the door and went back to bed.
Another 2 minutes passed and we heard knocking at our door.
 I guess we we're having a party and just didn't know it yet.
Jalon took that one and told him to go away.
After another 2 or so minutes, a knock came again.
A guy was standing there and asked Jalon for someone named "Dan".
Jalon just shut the door.
By this point, our lights were on and we were awake.
Jalon sat up and waited for another knock to come.
I decided to get creative.

I hung this on our door.
Actually, I hung it on our "Shhhh, do not disturb sign" because it needed some help.
I used a bobby pin to keep it on because I'm inventive in times of no tape.
(It was gone the next morning. I can only assume someone needed a bobby pin badly.)
I'm pretty sure it worked, since we didn't hear another peep the whole night.
Except for the screaming outside, millions of sirens and car noises.
We are not city people.
Not at all.


  1. Hysterical! I love this!!

    However, what I don't love is what happened to your skin. Ouch.

    And the prices. Holy cats.

    And, you do realize that Froggie could be used as evidence in a divorce trial? Well, maybe not, but that is a little cruel and unusual. ;)

    1. Awww...Froggie happens to be my best frog friend. He has such a silly face.

  2. OH dear. I hope you showed your neck to the people who gave you that massage and asked for your money back! yikes! Sounds like next time y'all need a rural B&B somewhere.

    1. Agreed! I had no idea that wasn't supposed to happen. I was thinking my skin just happens to be really sensitive. But I'm more of a quiet hotel in the middle of nowhere type of person.

  3. I'm sorry to laugh at your misfortune, but the way you write it is very funny. And I'm with KP here, whoever did your massage, sucked. You should have them fired. That's NOT supposed to happen.

    If someone kept pounding on the wrong door, I would have sent my husband to go answer it. All he has to do is shoot them one of his looks, and I swear that dude would have taken off running. He is intimidating as heck and has a habit of scaring the crap out of people. It comes in handy when visiting the city, which we don't often do either. :)

    1. My husband is usually like that, but he was too tired. I had no idea that wasn't supposed to happen with a massage, but I won't be going again. Bleh.

  4. This type of stuff always happens to us when we try to have a "romantic" anything. We went out for our anniversary once to a nice restaurant, but the entire time we were both exhausted and just wanted to be curled up on the sofa with pizza and a Dexter marathon.

    My son was recently out of town on a trip, and I asked Chris what we could do. He said, 'Oh, we're going to live it up! I've got season 2 of Boardwalk Empire and maybe we could get Chinese?" :)

    1. Yeah, right now we are diving into a Big Bang Theory marathon. Next weekend, we are planning a Star Wars marathon. Exciting people we are.

  5. That does not sound like an enjoyable time and I hurt for you when I saw the neck picture - ouch! I'll take my frog, cricket and bird noises over sirens, screaming, and car noises any day - although, our friends from big loud cities have trouble sleeping at our house. The frogs can get really loud.

    1. Yeah, I'm a middle-of-nowhere girl. We don't have frogs here, but the crickets and birds lull me to sleep each night.

  6. Sounds awful! But an amusing story.....i'm nt a fan of Starbucks but you can always find one! No matter where you are in the world. froggy looks very cute on the bed. Did he have a good time?

    1. I'm not a huge fan of starbucks either, but I'm a super huge fan of caffeine and we were out of options =). He had a wonderful time. He didn't have to answer the door at all.

  7. Oh, not fun! I'm sorry you had trouble on your trip.

    1. Me too. But it made for a slightly interesting story =).

  8. That's a fancy hotel room! I thought massages were meant to be relaxing sans bruises.

    And I would have kicked that guy if he woke me up in the middle of the night hahaha!


    1. I wanted a baseball bat that night. I wanted one night of undisturbed sleep, usually it's the kids waking us up. But instead, a bunch of drunk people looking for a party.

  9. Oh wow, that's awful!! The living in a store bit sounds awkward, like you can't really relax in case you un-seal something and then have to pay for it!

    Did you complain about the phone calls and weird guy knocking? There's definitely room for complaint there! I'd have been pissed!!

    Sorry to hear your massage drama, don't give up on them though - if you get someone good it's amazing! It is a gamble though...

    1. I'm not a huge fan of people touching my back, so I don't think I'll be getting another massage. I'll stick with nails and feet.


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