Stress+ Panic+ spending money= ulcers and maybe a new diet plan.

Oh. My.

I just spent a butt load on my husband for Christmas.

My justification for spending so much?

I have FINALLY (after 9? years of marriage) found something he will actually LIKE.

Every year, I go hunting for the perfect gift for the man that's impossible to shop for.

Every single year, I fail miserably. Don't get me wrong, he would never tell me he hated a gift, but I know that they weren't gifts he had on his list.

Usually the gifts he has on his list are hard to find, hard to buy, hard to pick up alone or someone else has already purchased them.

Then I have to pull out a make-it-work moment and get some crap I found on sale at Kohls and a pair of pajama pants.

BUT not this year, folks!

THIS IS MY YEAR!

The award for Gift of the Year goes to me. Winner winner chicken dinner.

We won't be eating in January, but he'll love this gift.

Spending such a large sum, makes me incredibly nervous though. I'm trying to breathe through this and knowing that he's going to love it does help...but wow. I'm sweating.

And knowing that I'm not done Christmas shopping yet...the shakes are starting to set in. I have plans and ideas written down but not a lot purchased yet.

Writing them down is one thing...actually purchasing them is what makes me nervous. I get buyers anxiety. ARG. I'm going to give my list to Jalon and send him out for the items. Maybe then I can breathe.

Because of all this anxiety, I don't sleep anymore. Nope. I sit in bed and think. I write lists in my head. Or come up with new ideas. Dinner ideas, what I need at the grocery store, a new idea that the Elf on the Shelf can do, a Christmas present for someone, RACK plans, or a date night idea.

Seriously. Get the big pan and give me a good whack.

I can't eat food. I'm queasy. My fingers are all swollen and tingly, add in some body aches at night and toss in a headache in the morning. What is wrong with me?

Oh yeah...it's the holidays.

Eventually, I'll get into a routine and presents will be purchased and done. We won't go broke and life will move on. I just need to get past this part alive.

Speaking of shopping, guess who had a blast on Black Friday?

Yup, even had fun in line chatting up the people nearby while freezing our butts off in the snow.

Was it worth it?

Duh. I didn't see anyone get trampled, stabbed or even slightly hurt. I did get a toe stepped on, but I survived.

Everyone was super friendly, very quick and efficient. We were in and done in 45 mins. We went in, found what we needed, then wandered around for a bit. It was wonderful. Except when I grabbed the wrong thing and paid more than I wanted to. My bad.

What I did notice, that there were a couple rude people. My husband suggested an elbow or two, but I figured they just felt that their mission was more important than mine. I wasn't there to fight to the death over a Nintendo 3DS. I wanted the deal, but not enough to harm/get hurt for it. Target was set up so smoothly that it was a nice shopping experience. Go Target!

Thanksgiving was wonderful and filling. We had a great meal, yummy desserts and a few games. Even some snow that evening. On Friday I was able to decorate for Christmas and now I'm offically able to watch Christmas movies without getting teased for it.

On a final note, my 2 year old son decided to strip down to nothing and pee on his floor. Guess who's getting a new potty chair for Christmas? So not ready for potty training yet. Was hoping to wait until spring but I don't think we're going to be able to wait that long. Or I'll have to buy more carpet cleaner. I had to toss this in here because he just did it and I don't have anyone here to share it with. Lucky you!

That's about all I have for updates. Panic. Stress. Anxiety. All part of my world. No matter how hard I try to avoid it and say I'm fine, it sneaks up on me when I'm ready to sleep.

Help.