Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Walking with Him

Starting this month, our Church began The Story. It's been great, digging in and really exploring the Bible on a different level. It brings up questions and thoughts I wouldn't have had on my own.

In the workbook portion, there was a personal reflection that had me open my eyes a little and I really felt inspired to write about it.

It talks about taking a walk outside to appreciate God's beauty and what He made. Exploring nature, taking time to see the little things that we miss on a normal day, and taking time to just thank God for this moment.

We all have different burdens that we carry. Some burdens may be heavier than others, no one really knows, but either way, we tend to forget God while carrying this burden.

It can be so heavy, that taking one more step, or waking up one more day, is just too exhausting to think of. It feels as if we've been forgotten, that God has left us to carry this burden on our own and it may feel like you're alone. This is when I forget to pray. This is when I make the mistake of trying to take things on by myself, without asking God for his help and guidance.

But God never abandons us.


And, I need to be intentional in my walks with God, so that I don't ever forget that fact.

Why walks?

My favorite way to connect with God, is by taking a walk outside. No matter the weather, no matter the day I've had, I can walk and talk with him during these walks.

It's hard to not feel connected with God when I'm outside appreciating the beauty He created right before me.

I've been having a hard time with my anxiety/depression/OCD lately and it's been difficult to pray about it. The darkness of these struggles, swallow me whole, until I feel alone and forgotten. Anxiety is tricky like that, it has the ability to make me feel like I don't matter. It's hard to just push it aside and talk myself into smiling that day. I have to force myself to be present in the day and not run and hide in a room until I feel better.

That's when I take a walk. I take that time to just be present in this moment, in this very day, and that's all I have to do.

It's during this time that I remember that I don't have to carry all this around with me by myself. I forget that God has been walking right next to me the entire time, with open arms, just waiting for me to pass him my own burdens. He will help me carry them, He will help me along because that's how great God really is.

In this Autumn weather, the leaves are turning their brilliant shades of red, yellow and orange, reminding me that no matter what comes our way, it won't last for long. That this darkness that sometimes fills my head with fear and anxiety, will pass and there will be good days again.

The air, turning chilly, with the reminder of winter mornings not too far ahead, brings us cleansing air that shoots right into my lungs, filling me with hope of a fresh start in this day. That even though I'm having a rough start, or a rough moment, God gave it to me and I always have the opportunity to start over new again.

I feel the sadness of another summer passing, my children getting older and my garden finishing it's time with us. My garden, frozen with the early morning frost, begins to wilt and die, taking those sunny days, spent with my kids in the sprinklers and warm nights, toasting treats over the bonfire, with it.

And then I see it.

A small, leftover promise, still blooming despite the chill of autumn and gloom of cloudy days. A bright white Dinner Plate Dahlia.

White and pure, as if the strength and beauty of God's love is blooming right there for me to see. A reminder from his creation that no matter what comes our way, there's still beauty to be found here. A promise that, despite the darkness that seems to overwhelm us at times, He is still here, waiting for us to see Him. No matter our burdens, He is there waiting for us to lift them up to Him.

He shows us in our everyday, if we chose to see it.

That is why I walk with God. So He can remind me, every single day (if so needed), that He is still here, walking right beside me.

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