Seriously Monday?

Monday may be trying to kick my ass.

All weekend, it's been fairly normal- get up with kids, eat, play, blah blah blah.

Today, I get up at 7 a.m. and Evan is hacking like he has the plague. Not a good sign. Not sure if it's just allergies or the beginning of a cold.

The twins aren't awake yet. We have to leave in order to drop Evan off at school around 7:45 a.m.
On the weekends the twins wake up at 6:30. Screaming, jumping like crazy and ready for the day.

Today, of course, I had to shake them awake at 7:50. I wake Declan up, pop him in the car with Evan and then head in for Morgan.

I try to get going early because the school drop-off is absolute chaos. Now it's 7:55 and school starts at 8:10.

Morgan is awake, but sitting there staring at me quietly. It's a big weird for her to be that quiet in the morning and I start to wonder why. Then I walk into the room and figure it out all on my own. How?
She smells. REALLY bad.

I think, "hey, it can't be that bad. This can wait until we get home. It's just poop, it's not going anywhere."

But I'm an idiot. Because we are running late, it's a Monday and I hate dealing with 800 other parents in school drop-off, of course I touch her I realize that poop is leaking out everywhere. So I have to change her. And she's screaming because it must have been there for a bit and now she has a rash. I slap a new outfit on her (think hot pink sweatsuit- it's in the 50's today so it's cool enough) and we roll out.

And we pull up to the school at 8:05. The WORST time to arrive. I had to narrowly escape 2 near collisions with teenagers trying to get to their school down the road (their car had a hanger as an antenna, never seen that done on a car before...), just to get to the line that we would sit in waiting for parents to FINALLY say goodbye to their children. I already did a blog post regarding this part. Think Target on Black Friday, except you don't walk away with a flat screen TV.

Parents- you don't need to watch your child get through the doors. Get them out of the car and go away. Done. That's it. It's simple. There are helpers there to make sure children walk through the doors. Drive off now. You are taking up a TON of time, sitting there in your car while the rest of us wait on you.

I tell Evan to tuck and roll and we drive by and wave. Never had to even stop the car.

Morgan says "good-bye Eban" and you hear her make kissy noises. Declan starts screaming (with what I believe to be joy) and we're off. Takes us under 30 seconds to do drop-off. I think I may have the world record.

Well, it's almost that good. I do have to open the door for him because I can't figure out how to turn off the child-proof lock on my door. Stupid safe doors.

I wish they had a giant body guard, with a bat, that would stand there and if you take too long dropping off your child, he starts by taking out your headlights. Then moves on to your doors. And he would also control the weirdos that try to go the "wrong" way just because they think they are better than everyone else and don't need to wait in the line. There would need to be 3 bodyguards, at least, for this job.

I would probably park my car and bring coffee for that show.

Monday, you may have won this round, but it's not over yet!

I just cursed myself...and I still have to do pick-up with all the same crazy people. Crap.

I'm going to need more caffeine.