How a home remodel may turn into divorce papers.

Jalon and I are great together.

He's my best friend and to him, I'm the most annoying person in the world and I'm not sure how he stands me.

But we manage to get along and for the most part, we are on the same page about everything.

We have managed to pick out many houses together, we have similar tastes in design and wall color, and when it comes to decisions, our opinions are very close to the same.

Except when it comes to the HUGE house remodel that we are planning.

We are either the smartest or dumbest people you will meet. We have decided to do the ENTIRE remodel all at once. This includes the kitchen, basement, garage and part of the living room.

Seems awesome, doesn't it? I get a brand new kitchen (and bigger too!), my husband gets his huge garage that I will have lots of parties in, the basement will be nice and neat for the kids and our living room window will be not foggy anymore. Our neighbors are going to HATE us! Actually, I'm pretty sure most of them do already, but now they will actually have a valid reason for it.

It's been 1 day and already we are annoying each other. He asked me to pick out a wall color to go with our kitchen and I panicked. I can't do this on a whim!?!? I need hours, days, maybe even weeks to decide what I want to do?! I CAN'T WORK UNDER PRESSURE! I need Menards or a Home Depot. Lots of paint samples in my hands, magazines to compare to and google images for backup. Where's my Redbull?! Don't you understand that this may take more than just a 5 minute stare at a computer with 25 colors to pick from?!

He said "You haven't picked one yet?"

"ARG! It's been 3 MINUTES! I need more time! I can't do this! I am going to bed!"

So you can clearly see that this remodel is going so well already.

It's stressful. I'm excited to get these things done, because it will be better and give our family the room we need to survive as the kids get older. I think the only way my husband will keep his sanity in check is if he has a larger garage to escape to and a basement to hide in. The kitchen will be the key to my sanity. It doesn't need to be much bigger, but a little more counter space would be helpful and a "real" kitchen table to eat at would be fantastic.

But, these things come at a cost.

And I'm not only talking monetary.

What I didn't anticipate was...well, lots of things.

1. I didn't realize how long my kitchen would be out of commission. Like 3 weeks of no cooking. That's...I'm freaking out. There are no words to describe how much this bugs me. I like to cook. I love being in my kitchen and I am not a huge fan of eating out. OH MY GOD MY KITCHEN I NEED MY KITCHEN I NEED TO BAKE PIES ALL OF A SUDDEN WHAT IF I CAN'T MAKE POT ROAST. Ok. I'm done.

2. During the process of tearing down and rebuilding a brand new garage, we will not be using the backyard (my haven, my garden and the place the kids reside during the day because they would drive me up the wall otherwise) and that's making me a little nervous.

3. The living room will be out of commission, maybe not as long, but now the kids won't get TV along with no kitchen and no playing outside? I'm going to have to get a prescription for some Prozac again. There's a window to replace and expand and the basement stairs will be moving to the living room instead of the kitchen.

4. And the basement. This would be the place I would take them when all that other crap is happening and we would just live down there. But now that this is being redone...I'm not sure where else to go.

Maybe we could just live in the hallway, with the bedrooms and the bathroom. There are 4 bedrooms and a bathroom to play in. Put the microwave in my bedroom and we can just pretend, right?

I'm thinking there are some more tense moments caused by stress and a tight living situation that will arise from now until December.

Just in time for the most relaxing time of the year. Christmas. Perfect.

Toss in the regular things in our schedule, school, twins therapy at our house, Jalon heading to school again, after school activities/sports and hopefully a flu or two and you will have my version of hell.

Except it will be in a beautiful and completed home, which is what I've always wanted.

It will be a huge accomplishment if we can celebrate Christmas as a family with good presents and not by opening a divorce settlement.

Bonus points if we can do this without sleeping in different rooms after fighting about what back splash to use in the kitchen.